Fifteen years ago today, my life changed. An old life of heartbreak and pain and lots and lots of tears came to an end, and a new life of hope and growth and joy began. But the journey to who I am today didn’t magically happen with the ending of one life. It’s been a struggle, a back and forth tug-a-war of emotion.
This week, I witnessed a life enter this world. It was messy and chaotic. Fifteen years ago, I witnessed a life leave this world. It was also messy and chaotic. Tears and pain were present at both events, and neither memory will ever leave my heart. Lives change with the coming and going of people, the in and out of this world. One thought kept crossing my mind as I watched a beautiful boy being born this week: I am so blessed to be here to see this miracle, to be 37, to live this life.
“I have spent my days stringing and unstringing my instrument, while the song I came to sing remains unsung.”-Tagore
So much of the past 15 years has been spent trying to recover who I am, to reclaim my own beautiful self. Never does it become more clear to me how far I’ve come than when I find myself doing something with confidence and a very certain absence of fear. But I’ve spent much more time not singing my song, merely preparing and then backing away, afraid.
“Don’t put off your happy life.”-Author Unknown
Healing and reclamation of self is indeed a process, but it need not take forever. Beginning in 2013, The Tiara Project will begin new journeys toward growth in an effort to help you reclaim your beautiful self. With a monthly newsletter, as well as monthly Tiara Photo Projects, together we can walk arm in arm into the light of thriving, not just surviving. Won’t you join me?
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Angela is a daughter of God, a mom of three, a wife to her best friend, a sister to many, a friend to many more, a mentor...a woman who has survived and now thrives. She is a writer, photographer, speaker, activist, and princess. You can also find her online at angelagilesklocke.com.